Honouring Our Bodies

I look at myself in the mirror and wonder what has become of my skinny, energetic twenty-year-old self. I have a conversation with the stranger in the mirror almost every day. I miss the old me, that could fit into skinny jeans and wear a figure hugging outfit without the unsightly rolls of fat hugging my middle. Then this morning I read an article that my friend posted on Facebook. It talked about an issue that has been bothering me for some time now. As mothers we continue to hold ourselves to the same standards of beauty as we did before we gave birth. We judge ourselves  harshly for the way our bodies change after we have children and as we age. This pressure to have flawless skin and the perfect body takes so much away from our experiences in life. Many of us are missing from family photos, when instead we should be at the centre surrounded by our loved ones. We are embarrassed to meet friends whom we haven’t seen since before the birth of our children. Sometimes we even suffer from depression and low self-esteem. This is not surprising since we are constantly bombarded by images of what society considers to be the standard of beauty.

The article was a poignant wake-up call for me that I must learn to accept the new me and honour my body for what it has given me. Two beautiful healthy children, who are my pride and joy and who remind me every day that each stretch mark is a memory of carrying life within me and that the ugly scar from my C-section is my personal trophy for bringing my daughter into this world. I have wrinkles now where there used to be smooth skin and dark shadows around my eyes that hide what used to be laughter lines. But these are monuments to the many sleepless nights I have spent when my children were sick or when I have been awake worrying about making the right choices for them.

Nowadays I watch my daughters, now eighteen and fourteen, looking at themselves in the mirror, fussing about a tiny pimple or imaginary fat thighs and I cringe at the thought that one day, years from now, they too will be sad at what they see in the mirror.

So I am making a promise to myself, to look at my body with eyes that are more kind than critical. And like the author of the article, I hope to teach my daughters to accept and love their bodies even when they are no longer skinny with flawless glowing skin, because life will leave its marks. I hope that instead they will learn to see that their beauty lies in the rich lives they have lived and in the ones they have created and nurtured.

Preparing For Success

In anticipation of my upcoming fame and appearances on numerous talk shows, I decided that this would be a good time to get rid of the many extra pounds that I found in the past year and a half as I was writing my YA novel Realm of the Goddess. During that time I embraced a diet of ice cream and chips and rewarded myself nightly with a fruity vodka concoction because I had spent the better part of my days being creative. Now that I am waiting with bated breath for editors and agents to tell me how much they love my book, I thought that I would take the time to get back in shape. You know, just in case I get discovered and they want to meet me.

So, I joined Weightwatchers online. Three days ago. So far it’s been fabulous. I went to the grocery store and successfully circumvented the cookie aisle, as well as the ice-cream section. Even took puppy for a nice long walk. I even tried to give up coffee and switch to water and green tea, but as I was tutoring my students later that day, I discovered that Math problems and chemical reactions are much friendlier to a well- caffeinated brain.

So now I’m happily counting points and waiting to hear from an editor who requested my entire manuscript.